A Rocky Analysis

The last few weeks there have been a string of Rocky movies shown on TV. I didn’t think much of it but very few people outside of the 007 family have played a character as often as Sylvester Stallone has played the Italian Stallion. Six times Sly put on the boxing shorts to portray his pugilist alter-ego and while many movie geeks like me know them all, I feel some sense of responsibility top my friends to take this opportunity to give you a short synopsis of the movies and whether they are worth watching or not.

ROCKY – The original and possibly the best of the six. A down-and-out Rocky Balboa is given the fairytale opportunity to fight for the World Heavyweight Championship against the reigning champion, Apollo Creed. Rocky is mentally slow (think sloth slow) but is a good natured guy everyone wants to cheer for. The outcome seems inevitable with an underdog beating the established champion, but I won’t ruin it as this was an outstanding movie made for a sequel set-up!

Watchability Factor – Have to see!

ROCKY II – The sequel was nearly as good as the original and was set up to let the once-upon-a-time underdog finish the job and bring home the championship! This sequel is somewhat predictable, but there are a view storylines thrown in to help to make this a fuller sequel than normal. I can guarantee that you will feel good when this movie ends.

Watchability Factor – Have to see this one also!

ROCKY III – Another Sequel that builds on the Rocky legend and shows how a champion’s career can be manipulated to make a less than stellar champion look legendary and then how that champion can overcome not only their place in life, but there lack of confidence once it is shaken. This movie is less dramatic than the first two; however, it is still quite entertaining and would have been a good spot to end the series.

Watchability Factor – Got to see Mr. T!

ROCKY IV – Maybe one of the last great Cold War Era Soviets-against-Americans Movies made. The Italian Stallion takes on the indestructibly juiced-up soviet boxing machine Named Ivan Drago - Terrifying. After the stereotypically named Ivan kills Rocky’s friend, the Stallion heads to Russia to train to challenge the Soviet Threat like every good American should. The final fight scene is okay and includes possibly one of the best Mikhail Gorbachev look-a-likes you’ll ever see. The final fight will get you motivated and you will really think this movie is great until Rocky grabs the microphone after the fight and goes all diplomatic on us. It one of those moments in movies where you can actually find yourself feeling embarrassed for the title character – OOOF! This should have been the end of the series!!!

Watchability Factor – Worth watching at least once.

ROCKY V – HOLY COW I still can’t believe they made this movie. I’ll give you a synopsis because this one is way too painful to watch….READY? Rocky loses all his money and has to go back to the Philly streets, he channels his inner Mickey, finds a young fighter to train, builds said fighter up, loses said fighter to a “Don King” look-a-like, and just when you think you have some idea where this one is going the young fighter comes back to find Rocky and challenge him to a…wait for it…a street fight! This is where Rocky whips the younger fighter and the movie blesses us all with ending.

Watchability Factor – NONE! This is a train-wreck that no one should stop and watch.

ROCKY VI – In the Mid-80s a comedian made a joke about a Rocky movie where the gray-haired Italian Stallion makes a return to whip a 20-something fighter in the ring. Sound a little bit far-fetched? Well apparently not to Hollywood execs since they made it! Storyline – when a video game simulation says that Rocky in his prime could beat the current champ, the current champ challenges a 65ish year-old Rocky to a fight. Don’t waste your time, Rocky wins and then goes through airport security in Australia and gets caught with more performance enhancing drugs than Jose Canseco had in his hey-day…Oh wait a minute; the last part was the real-life portion of it all.

Watchability Factor – VERY LITTLE. If you’re hung over and can’t change the channel I guess.

That’s it for the ROCKY series. Stay tuned for my next analysis.

YO ADRIAN!!!!

Later,

Bill

The Genius That Is…Well…ME Saving the USPS!!

In my never ending search to solve the problems that threaten to hinder the development and sustainability of all things this world has to develop and sustain I have come up with a few solutions that I think will revolutionize wealth redistribution and save the postal system!!


Exciting HUH?

First, how do we save the postal system?

ANYONE…BUELLER….BUELLER…

We simply increase the amount of mail being sent through the postal system!!

Yeah, I know, that’s surprisingly simple; but how can we do this? Let me explain!!

First, we use the old-fashioned, time-tested, government-frowned upon system known as the chain-letter-pyramid-scheme. For those of you who do not know how this works let me explain. Working off the fabled (or made-up-by-me) “Law of Sixes” you send out a letter to six people. That letter lists six people that the receiving six are to send $1.00 each to. Then those receivers copy the letter, taking off the first name and putting their names at the end of the list, and then sending it to six more people.

Now if you do the math on this it helps both the people involved in the letter and the Postal System and here is how!!

It helps the people in the letter like this:
1st Round – 6 people equals $6.00 – It’s a start!!
2nd Round – 6 times 6 people equals $36.00 more – Total of $42.00 – That’s more!!
3rd Round – 6 x 6 x 6 equals $216.00 for a total of $258.00 – Now we’re starting to cook!!
4th Round – 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 equals $1,296.00 for a total of $1,554.00 – Vegas Here we come!!
5th Round – 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 equals $7,776.00 for a total of $9,330 – Caesar’s Palace Emperor’s Package!!
6th Round – 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 x 6 equals $46,656.00 for a total of $55,983.00 – King Ranch F-350 BABY!!

There you go, just starting this and sending out 6 letters can garner you this small fortune! Heck, you could seemingly do this for the price of $6.00 plus some postage and you could possibly earn thousands.

What a country!!

Of course there is this one tiny problem that involves the authorities and their frowning on this practice; something about an illegal pyramid scheme or something like that. But surely this is more of a guideline than a rule - RIGHT? I guess the government is concerned that this might put them out of the wealth redistribution business.

But look at it from the stand point of the USPS. For every dollar involved in this wealth-generating enterprise, that equates to one piece of mail equaling $0.46 at the current rate so let’s do the math for just this one complete mailing of letters. If everyone did their civic and patriotic duty (and who wouldn’t) all the pieces of mail involved with just these six levels would equate to $25,753.56.

AND if let’s take it a little further and say 100 million of the adults in America were to do this just once a year. That would add $46 million to the Postal Service’s coffers!!

Okay, maybe it doesn’t save the postal service but by golly we would be trying…AND, I would get a new King Ranch F-350 out of the deal!!

I’ll take the red one Mr. Car-Dealer!!
Bill

No More $1 Dollar Bills!!

Here we go again. It’s just about time for another congressional session and a bunch of new legislators coming to Washington and there it is again, the proposal to get rid of the paper dollar bill and replace it with a coin.


Does it make sense?? YES!!

Will it happen?? Probably not!!

Why? Because we’re morons!!

Every two years this subject comes up and the reasoning to get rid of the paper dollar bill makes sense and the only reason we keep it is for the dumbest of childish reasoning.

Doing away with the paper dollar bill and going to a coin would save more than $5 billion dollars over a decade……FIVE BILLION DOLLARS!!! That’s the main, biggest, and most important reason to do this.

What are the reasons people want to keep making the paper dollar? We here are the most popular:
1. People don’t like carrying coins. Really, you couldn’t carry five or possibly six coins in your pocket. I mean c’mon man; once you get five of them you could trade it in for a $5 bill. I’ve never met a cashier who didn’t need smaller denominations.
2. The dollar coins are too hard to distinguish between them and a quarter – REALLY. You really want the reason we waste $5 billion dollars printing a paper dollar to be because you’re too inadequate at money recognition to determine the difference between a dollar coin and a quarter coin….BRILLIANT!!
3. It’s easier to fold the bills and put them in your pocket. Well you got me there!! You really can’t fold a coin, but it does fit neatly into your pocket.

So there it is. We can save money by using dollar coins or spend $5 billion over the next decade printing paper dollars so you can fold them up, put them in your pocket, and be able to tell the difference between your dollars and quarters.

Yeah, that makes sense.

Later,
Bill

The Fiscal Cliff is Coming!!

Okay, so it’s not another horror movie but it does seem to reflect the fear, chaos, and mayhem that generally envelope every horror movie I have ever seen. People are scared, unsure, and generally untrusting of everything and anything our representatives in Washington are saying – AND THEY SHOULD BE!!


Regardless of whether our elected officials are Republican, Democrat, Independent, Socialist, Green, Libertarian, Whig, or Organic (just checking to see if you’re listening); we need representation in Washington and we need that representation to work together. We send our representatives to Washington to serve in the House, the Senate, and the White House to work together to set policy and govern the country; not to divvy up into two sides and then loom over every topic from an unapproachable point of view.

Each representative sent to Washington is sent there to represent the people they are elected to represent; pretty simple huh? But what has been lost in Washington is the ability to work together to make decisions and compromises that make legislation possible to run the country. Tip O’Neil and Ronald Reagan had it. Newt Gingrich and Bill Clinton had it. But since 2000 that whole spirit of bi-partisanship has been lost. Well we need to find it again.

We elect our representatives based on the majority opinion of the electorate. Then those people go to Washington to make legislation based on those same principles and beliefs they were elected on. Amazing enough you can be true to those ideas and beliefs and still work together with those of differing beliefs and accomplish the necessary business of the country; a concept that has been lost for the last 12 years.

Take the Fiscal Cliff. Does anyone really understand it or have we just labeled it as such so both sides in Washington can use the title to their benefit and scare the American Public. So let’s look at the facts.
1. No one has a specific definition of the problem
2. No one had a specific plan or even a proposal.
3. No one wants to be a leader and the first start the discussion by talking in specifics.
4. No one wants to address tax reform.
5. No one wants to address entitlement reforms.
6. Medicare will cost us $42 trillion over the next decade; no one wants to address its reform.
7. No one even wants to have an open door meeting as promised.
8. AND NO – WE CANNOT KICK THE CAN DOWN THE ROAD AGAIN.

On January 1st the Bush Tax-Cuts will sunset (they were supposed to in 2009) and we will all be paying higher taxes; EVERYONE has to pay higher taxes. I am not crazy about that idea, but maybe this is what we all need to make the country realize we need real tax reform.

On January 1st there will be huge reductions to the budget (OK not huge but there will be significant cuts) that will affect anyone who receives government (i.e. Tax-Payer) sponsored entitlements. Of course that will have a positive effect on the deficits our federal government is racking up, but at what cost and for what reason?

Because those “Responsible” people we send to Washington keep holding to their partisan mantras and rather than work together for the betterment of the nation, they still want to work separate for the betterment of their parties. But who’s really to blame?

UMMMMMMMM…..US….ALL OF US!!

That’s right, we had a chance to make changes this year and we instead chose to send practically the exact same people back to Washington; the same House, the same Senate, and the same President.

Well we better start paying attention to what is actually going on in Washington and who is actually doing what. We have two more years just like the last two and then we have another election. The voters made their choice in support of the status quo on Election Day; now those elected to office need t make a choice; two more years of the same and a more outraged electorate, or they work together to make something happen.

And You – The Voter!! Will you pay attention and figure out how it works and let your voice be heard; or will you once again sit on your laurels and wait until there is even less left of this once great country. The choice is yours to make and yours to live with.

Pay attention, be active, and make a difference.

Maybe our leaders should do the same!
Bill

A Black Eye for Black Friday

Well it’s over!! Once again Thanksgiving has come and the real reason approximately 247 million people celebrate is now over. That’s right, that four-day shopping frenzy called Black “Friday” is over – Hallelujah!!

Granted the Marketing gurus have increased the size of it by calling it Gray Thursday, Black Friday (Uh-Hum and Saturday and Sunday) followed with Cyber-Monday.

Holy Mistletoe Batman!!

What the heck ever happened to just driving to Grandma’s, eating too much wonderful food, playing some chess with Granddaddy, shooting some hoops with the cousins, taking a turkey-induced nap, watching some football, and enjoying the comedic styling’s of Uncle Charlie in his slightly drunken stupor later in the evening (Okay, maybe that last part was just at our house).

But seriously, I just saw a commercial for Ford saying they were extending their Black Friday savings through the entire month – REALLY? Do we actually need a full month of this?

Okay, maybe I’m a little sensitive to all this, but come on folks; why do we feel this constant need to save money we don’t have. Remember when the holidays were about what they are supposed to be about? You know, spending time with family, eating good food, being thankful for the blessings in our lives, enjoying the actual holidays and not the spending it with 247 million other holiday shoppers who are out spending the money they really don’t have because some advertising schmuck sold us on a bill of goods.

Oh Well, I guess I will stay on the outside looking in. I’ll continue to spend the holidays as I have in the past; sitting around the house enjoying the day. I’ll just keep spending time with family and friends. Eat some great food and watch some good (and not-so-good) football. And most importantly I’ll be keeping Drunk Uncle Charlie out of trouble!!

I got to find the chess set!

Bill

 

NOTE: the names in this blog have been changed to protect the innocent…and the intoxicated.

Be an Informed Voter, not a Victim.

For those of us who are political junkies it’s hard to rationalize an existence where someone does not keep up with the current events of our times. So many people waltz through life with no idea of how the events in Washington or their state capital actually affect their daily lives. They simply see the problem as too big for them to do anything about and rely on others to handle the situation.


Some folks will say they did their part by voting, but did they really? It’s simple to go into the voting booth and select a name. The question is why are you selecting that name? Is it because that person believes as you do or is it because that person had a really cool commercial or a really catchy sound bite you heard?

Recently Howard Stern had one of his minions go out and do a man-on-the-street segment where he asked people questions about the presidential election. Not really hard questions like who is the Constitution Party’s Candidate (that would be Virgil Goode if you were wondering), but he had his reporter ask some none-the-less tough questions like if Mitt Romney being black would prevent you from voting for him? To which he mostly received a response of “No.”

Some of the other questions were such as; did they like President Obama’s selection of Paul Ryan as a running mate, how would Sarah Palin fare in this election, Can John McCain get more votes this election, if Obama has a second term can he get bin Laden, and others that were just as ridiculous. I say ridiculous because anyone with even a minor grasp of reality would know that these were all trick questions. Trick questions that were only asked to demonstrate the lack of knowledge 90 percent of America actually has about the politicians who are aspiring to, running for, or serving in elected office that do control our government.

I am writing this blog today not to solicit votes for either party, I have other blog sites for that and you can check those out if you want to as they are linked to this blog. Today I am writing this blog to ask each of you who will read this to take the time and check out the candidates who are running for office. Check out their records and what they have accomplished. Watch the upcoming debates on TV so you can get a feel for the candidates.

Whether you watch ABC News, CBS News, CNN, FOXNEWS, MSNBC, NBC news or any of the others; whether you read the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Austin American Statesman, Dallas Morning News, or the Washington Post; don’t go to the polls uneducated, be an informed voter. Get some facts, talk to those you’re close to, and learn what the candidate’s stance is on the issues; then you can go out and make an informed vote.

For far too long, Americans have simply voted based on name recognition and half-truths. Sadly, many politicians, and those who want them in power, will tell you what they think you need to hear to vote for their candidate. It’s not their job to make an informed choice, that’s your job. It’s their job to get elected and sadly many will do whatever they have to in order to accomplish that.

So this election season, get out and be active in the election process. Don’t wait until the last minute and make a spur of the moment decision. Get out and take a look at the candidates and see who best represents the values and beliefs you hold dear. Be a part of the solution, not an enabler, and thereby victim, of the problems.

I’m off my soapbox now!
Bill

How Much College is too Much College?

Having attended college (many colleges), having watched my wife go through college, and having two kids in college, err….paying for two kids to go to college, I feel more than adequately qualified to speak on this topic. We get our college bound kids ready for college with 13 years of school prior to high school graduation and then send them off to college to select the education that will drive their future. This is where the insanity begins.

Once they arrive they have to complete the basic “Core” curriculum. For those who may not know, the core curriculum is made up of the same core classes these kids took in high school consisting of Math, English, Science, and other various classes. This is the problem I have with a typical college degree program. Why is it that a student majoring in English needs to take biology or geology? Likewise, why is it a student majoring in Geology needs to take British literature? Similarly, why does a student majoring in kinesiology need to take a class in philosophy or theatre?

Why? Well there seems to be a couple of reasons. One of them is to make a well-rounded student which is complete bunk as I never ever seen a high school coach whip their athletes into a no real frenzy by quoting Shakespeare of by philosophizing like Socrates. My personal favorite reason is the most overused line of all, “that’s the way it’s always been done.” But none of these are the real reason.

The real reason is that many people each year get degrees in English, Math, Theatre, Philosophy, Foreign Language, Humanities, PE, and other subjects for which that only real use for these degrees is in the realm of education. Therefore the only way to continue to secure these people jobs and to provide for a future generation of folks getting these degrees is to make them required torture for those looking for a degree in say engineering, medical fields, or electronics.

Now I’m not saying we should ignore those in the fields that make up the core curriculum. And I do believe that all college students should have to pass a qualifying course in basic English, basic math, and basic science; however, if a student passes a qualifying class then they shouldn’t have to sit through three or four more years of English, or math, or science, or philosophy. This would save students (and their parents) money and allow for two other alternatives.

The first alternative is that students could graduate earlier and then be allowed to take an internship to complete the degree. This would not only get the student the education he will actually need but it will provide them with real world experience before they are launched into the work force.

The second alternative would be for students to remain in school for the same amount of time they currently do, but they would have the opportunity to take more classes that pertain to their major. This would allow the students to be better educated in the job skills they are actually at college to learn.

Either way the students will be better educated in the major they are in school to pursue. Unfortunately we have a collegiate culture that is more about continuing the same traditional methods we have always used and not about what is actually better for the consumer, a consumer who is directly the student in this case and indirectly the work force in which they will be going out into after their time in academia is over.

It’s amazing that we have been able to streamline and improve most everything in our lives, but when it comes to a good college education somehow we have managed to leave that process back in the early 1900s. Unfortunately, the decisions over this sort of qualifying process are made by the very same people who benifet from the system being stuck where it is.

Maybe I need to create a college? Anybody got some land, money, buildings, books, teachers, and mascot they can spare?

I need to look at my degree plan!

Bill